At what sacrifice

I can’t help but notice the benefit of my PCOS-approved diet. I’ve lost 2.6 lbs in the past week, despite eating normally three of those days (Friday, Saturday and Sunday–the days before I started this plan).

The problem is: I’m friggin’ hungry.

Good news: I’m breaking my carb cravings.

Bad news: I’m still freakin’ hungry.

So I’m trying to ignore these back and forth thoughts about the value of this weight loss plan. The dedicated dieter in me thinks:

  • I could be down 14 lbs by my birthday and be at a weight I haven’t seen in 10 years.
  • I could be down 32lbs by the time I participate in the triathalon, which will make the last leg–the 5k run–so much easier!
  • I could be down 40lbs by the time my students return to campus, which will also likely put me in a size I haven’t seen since high school or college.
  • I would be at goal (easily) by Christmas and I could enjoy the holiday, the celebrations and the family photos back at my normal and healthy weight. What a way to ring in the new year!
  • Even if I eventually slowed to 1lb a week, I’d be at goal by my next birthday.

But is all of this worth the hunger and the deprivation I sometimes feel? I should know better than to count my chickens before they hatch. I’ve done that before. Right around the time my body decided to stop dropping weight. But without the anticipation of cute little baby chicks, I struggle to see the benefits of this current plan, especially with not knowing if I’ll be able to increase my calories to a more moderate 1500-1700 daily.

Currently, every time my stomach growls, I think about goal. Feeling hunger equals weight loss. But, this HAS to be short term for me. Quite honestly, Christmas 2010 isn’t short term enough. I’m gonna do this as long as I can and when it starts getting overwhelming, I’m going to take a week off and do a week at my old plan: a comfortable 1500-1700 calories, still working out 5 days a week, expecting to maintain. And then I’ll start this 1200 calorie shindig again until I can’t. And back and forth I’ll go until it’s over. If it will ever be over.

Tuesday I ran 2 miles without a walking break for the first time. Just like this diet, I didn’t want to do the run. I took it 5 minutes at a time, knowing that I could slow down and walk whenever I wanted and as each of those 5 minute increments passed, I convinced myself that it wasn’t so bad and I could do another 5 minutes.

That’s exactly what this diet is like and that’s exactly what it will take to be successful with this plan. Focus, determination and taking it moment by moment.

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6 responses to “At what sacrifice

  1. Oh, Tina…the age-old debate. I, myself, constantly ponder this very question. On one hand, deprivation does some wacky things to my brain. If I’m on a very restricted diet and feel extremely deprived, I WILL find a way to satisfy that craving, no matter how hard I try to suppress it. Plus, I think of weight loss as this extremely negative experience. And I’m also counting down the days until I finish the diet, which also spells bad news for the long run. I mean, what good is losing weight if you gain it all back?

    On the other hand, it’s tempting to want to get rid of weight much faster. Since ramping up my weight loss efforts in January, I’ve lost 10 pounds. That’s it. And I still want to lose at least 35 more. Some weeks it feels like this process is so slow, I wonder if it’s even working. It’s hard to see and feel progress at that rate. And I haven’t even had people comment that I look thinner, since it’s been so slow. And that positive reinforcement counts for something.

    It’s such a tough question, but in the end we all know ourselves best. If you think you can lose weight this way–quickly and painfully–and then keep it off once you reach your goal, weigh the benefits and make your decision. But remember that time will pass whether you’re losing weight slowly or quickly, so think about whether or not those extra few months of being thin, versus doing it the slow way, will be worth the pain of this diet.

  2. Congrats on the awesome loss! That’s very exciting. I do think that if you’re hungry – eat something! Some carrots and hummus, an apple, something substantial that will hold you over. Remember that now you are running and training for a triathlon so you’re burning lotsa calories – eat to fuel.

  3. Congrats on the loss. I am sorry that you have to be on this low calorie diet in order to lose weight! It must be such a struggle especially because you are quite active. I’m anxious to continue reading about it because I want you to be successful.. you try so hard, you deserve it!

  4. I think it will get easier… i remember everytime for me I started trying to lose weight.. that first week was the hardest and then it would start getting easier… you have a good support group.. call friends when you need it… you rarther be healthy and in a good weight range than at an unhealthy weight and at more risk for disease… you can do it…

  5. Pingback: What to eat… « Downsized!

  6. Pingback: Downsized!

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